Soul Stirring

We've been through two weeks worth of campers.  Week 1 kids were fantastic.  No big problems besides one sassy girl, but I grew to love her since she stayed for two weeks.  Week 2 kids on the other hand were not fun.  They asked too many questions and were awkward to the point of exhaustion.  Here are some highlights from the last two weeks. Get ready for some randomocity.

I've seen numerous kids bite the dust during Mud Hikes and almost get attacked by a raccoon.  I have two fantastic partners that make me laugh ALL the time, even when it isn't appropriate. On my last night off I got to share the world's best firefly show with several new counselors. I slept on the Suspension Bridge even though that's been one of my worst fears since I was eight.  Conquered a Float Trip through the pouring rains and almost lightening strikes in metal canoes with twenty campers in tow.  I witnessed some amazing young woman change from quiet girls into beautiful lionesses.  Took my cabin of five to a very special Pop Stop on the Suspension Bridge where we saw a fish catch a dragonfly.  Even though I am terribly exhausted, I must say that I feel so content. 

This summer so far has blown past like a tornado. I don't think that I have ever laughed so frequently in my life.  They aren't five second laughs either.  All of them have been those gut wrenching soul loving kind of laughs. It's amazing what a few weeks at Camp T. can do to your heart :)

This isn't Camp TeFunseh

BOOM ROASTED
SHOOT DANG
OOPS. HIGH FIVE.

The last seven days were dedicated to staff training at camp.  Let me just say that about 60 percent of the counselors at CT this summer have never been a resident counselor.  That being said, this officially will be the best summer ever!  There is just something magical about our staff this year.  After numerous lectures, safety drills and countless games, our 100 odd some res staff bonded.  Thursday night I sat in a daze when all, and I mean ALL, of them stood on their chairs at the end of dinner singing theme songs from our childhood like Doug, Power Rangers, Green Day, and Backstreet Boys. Normally during a scene like this our boss would tell us to sit down.  But I turned around and DW himself was smiling and singing along to the songs.  Life doesn't get better than that. 

I made some truly amazing friends during training this year.  I made sure to sit with the new staff during most of the week long training to put myself out there.  Although this is my third summer on staff, I have never felt more welcome into such a large group of people.  Tomorrow means campers.  Tomorrow means a new beginning.  Tomorrow means the start of the best summer that Camp Tecumseh has ever seen!

If you're going to make me cry, at least be there to wipe away the tears.

An earsplitting cry broke me out of a deep slumber at seven this morning.  Between that and the heavy pitter patter going up the steps I became quite confused.  Turns out it was my sister's way of waking me up.  I quickly dashed upstairs to see what was wrong.  She handed me a piece of paper and broke out in loud sobs.  It was a note from her boyfriend of 6 months. He had left in in her car the day before. In it he said that he was a different person than when they first started dating and because of that he could no longer see her anymore.  No real explanation. No face to face contact to break it off.  My heart plummeted downward into a spiral.  This situation seemed so familiar.  As my sister sat crying she asked me why this happened and why he wasn't willing to give her the closure that she so desperately needs.  I was speechless. How do you tell someone that the person they love doesn't want to see them anymore?  How can I give her any advice when my heart has finally made peace with my own situation?  When I saw her sitting on the coach like that, it reminded me so much of myself several months ago.  Even if I tell her that the hurt will eventually go away, that won't help her right now.  I want to help her so badly but I don't know how :(

Lists, Lists, Lists

Lists are my thing. So here's what I did today.

1.  Visited with my second grade class from last semester.  They were so surprised to see me because I hadn't been back in a couple of weeks.  I got to read to them, listen to their funny conversations, play outside with them, and walk them to class.  But the best part happened in a subtle gesture.  My cooperating teacher decided to make girl/boy lines and make it a quiet contest on the way to music.  One of my favorite kids, Emma, said "Miss Garwood, you're in the boy line" and quietly laughed at me.  She then took my hand and pulled me into the right line.  We held hands the entire way to music and she squeezed my hand the whole time.  I love my class :)

2.  Shadowed a bus driver.  Since I have to drive a bus on on the Rez in SoDak, my mom hooked me up with a bus driver from her school.  It was fun to watch and interact with the kids. This school district is special.  They are a huge farm community and at each stop seriously four kids from the family get off.  It's great to see that kind of a community. Maybe one day when I come back to Indiana and my mom retires then I'll take her place as the newest kindergarten teacher :)

3.  Stole a bunch of stuff from my mom's closet at school.  I'm now the proud owner of numerous name plates, pocket charts, birthday/color/month charts, student of the week activities and even a huge 3 layer container of craft items.  The teacher torch has officially been passed down, finally.

4.  Had dinner at Dynasty with my high school best friend, Cassie.  It's our favorite place to eat together and always will be.  We caught up on each other's lives and made inappropriate dinner convo.  I just like seeing the people's reactions around us hehe.  I love how we may not see each other in awhile but it's like we're still seniors in high school just chilling at the beach.  Since she didn't bring her toddler with her, we even managed to fit in some speeding along the way :)

5.  Started packing for camp!  I decoupaged my drawers and am super duper excited about it!  Expect more pictures soon. Also that I seriously have ten different lists going for different things I need to get or accomplish before Saturday.  Let the rush begin!

Laugh as much as you breathe and love as long as you live.

Graduation presents (laptop and cell phone)--check

Paperwork for Red Cloud school and Camp T--check

Packed for June 4th--check


I want to be in the place where friendships are formed from mud hikes, devotions, and tornado sirens. 

I want to be in my kindergarten classroom so that I can make awesome bullentin boards and welcome my students to an amazing atmosphere.

I want to be in a place that takes me out of my comfort zone and that will help me become a better person.

Now, just waiting for the rest of my life to start.  I wish it would get here quickly!

Falling from Grace

The last couple of years I've kept in contact with a few of my favorite campers.  One of my fav's, Grace, started out with me two summers ago as an awkward, tall, bushy haired girl and has now turned into a beautiful young woman.  This whole time we've kept in contact sending back letters/friendship bracelets.  We've been there for each other for the heartaches, battles, and it has turned into a genuine friendship that I never expected.  Today I had to break it to her that I have to be out in South Dakota the week that she returns for her last experience with Camp T.

She didn't take it lightly and my heart broke a little as I told her.  Miss Grace is like the little sister that I never had.  I looked forward to her brightly colored letters at home and her persistent emails over the summer.  Part of me would always be at camp when Grace was there.  I'll always remember the day we sat on the hill two summers ago as she told me that she was grateful I was her swimming buddy for Lake time.  I'll always remember when we cried together during closing campfire Summer 2009 because we knew nothing would quite be as special.  I'll always remember when I dropped her (accidently) during our trust exercise one Thursday night.  I'll always remember when her counselors last summer found it difficult to get to know her because she told them that she'd rather be in my cabin.  This girl is special.  She brings a unique sense of self to each person that she reaches out to.  I'll miss her dearly but to know that I've made a deep impact on a child like her makes my summers at Camp worth going back year after year.

This is what she wrote to me today:

abby-
camp t has been one of my favorite places in the world since i went there my first year. but you are the person who kept it one of my favorites. you are my favorite counselor ever because you're more than just a counselor-you're my friend. you take care of me like no one else, and love me for who i am. i will miss you so much thi...s summer, and even though it's my last, i will never forget you and me walking from the OC to the dining hall arm in arm, crying at closing campfire, and cheering each other up throughout our sicknesses and sadness. i love you so much and will write you all the time. hopefully at some point i can come visit, although that will be a hard sell to the parents. but i'll try! love you, grace

I can't wait to see her as a counselor in a few short years :)

Making Time for Silence

I've had a lot of time since graduating college just to think.  Sometimes in my case that can be bad.  My counselor and I talked this week about the upcoming changes in my life and touched on part of my past that we hadn't talked about in awhile.  Coming to terms with loosing a friendship is never easy to say the least.  My counselor made me all too aware that I need to make changes not for others, but for myself otherwise I'll never make it through this depression.  She opened up my eyes to  a term the Native American's use and it's called "making silence".

Out on the Plains where I'll be living there is nothing for miles around.  I need to be comfortable with this idea and learn how to bask in the beauty of such a place.  Going from a town of 30,000 to a tiny town of less than 2,000 leaves  A LOT of open space. I've been reading many books lately about coping with a lifestyle that will be quite different from the one I was raised in.  From what they say, it's all about becoming comfortable with silence.  That's not easy for me.  Silence to me (besides when I'm praying) is often awkward.  So, my counselor suggested that I go on a run to places where I have distinct memories and feel comfortable being silent.  Yesterday I ran to a few of them......past the mailbox where an old boyfriend and I were stopped by the cops,  past the park where I spent most of my time as a kid, past the church that I've grown up in, past my college, and past multiple friends' houses along the way.  I ended my little adventure in the woods where I have the most distinct memories of my childhood.  My sister and I used to play with the neighborhood boys for hours on end out there building forts and playing on the rope swing.  I climbed my favorite tree, took a deep breath, and took it all in.  No. Nothing magical happen but I guess it's one step at a time.