Lightning and Thunder

Confession:  I love storms.  Don't think most people know that about me.  I was the kid at camp that would drive my counselors crazy and run out into the middle of the field during the middle of a huge storm just to see if I could be hit by lightning.  Last night I woke up to a big storm taking over NW Indiana.  It was the best kind of storm too-lots of heat lightening at first, then hail and eventually rain.  I snuck out of the house to have some personal time.

I love sitting on my front porch and seeing the heat lightning.  It's like God finally makes his presence known.  After the hail moved to rain, I stepped out in the cold wearing my sweatpants, bare feet and sweatshirt.  I sat down in the wet grass and just gave my thoughts up to Him.  It's been awhile since I've talked to Him like that.  My mind wondered to a conversation with a friend from earlier that day.  The friend was concerned that I keep alot of stuff in.  The last year, I've kept alot inside and never told my friends about what's actually been going on in my life. I told my friend that I keep stuff bottled up inside because if I don't, then I will get hurt.  Been there, done that.  Don't want that to happen again.

As I quietly sat in my front yard, I noticed how the rain poured down onto me. I didn't care that I was cold, sobbing wet, or that I would probably get sick from doing something like this.  All I could think about was that in many ways, I've hidden myself from God.  Yes, I know that's a silly thought since He can observe us all the time.  But, I mean that I've hidden my heart for the longest time.  I'm scared of opening up again.  I stayed outside for a long time talking with God about what He wants for my life.  As I sat in the grass, the rain finally stopped and my eyes fully adjusted to the darkness.  Strangely enough, I could see a deer run through my neighbors yard at that moment.  It was like God was saying that everything would be okay.  Just like He would guide that deer to safety that night, so would He for me.  Talk about one of those "A-HA" moments that people talk about.

I'm happy that I have 25 wonderful 8 year olds to go to every morning.  I'm grateful that these amazing second graders are in my life and that God has chosen that path for me.  That's all that matters. Even though I clearly have a cold now due to my late night escapade, I'm so thankful for lightning storms and His creation.